This Chair Rocks

An easy, sensible, welll-researched, thought-provoking and inspiring read. She kept my attention all the way. I quibble with a few things -- I think she underestimates the fragility of aging bodies (75 and up) in the face of extreme forms of medical care, and sometimes I disagree with her use of statistics to paint a rosier picture than I think is warranted. But it's a breath of fresh air, and made me think hard about the internalized shame that currently surrounds aging. She threads the needle, neither denying the realities of aging, nor bemoaning them, nor giving in to "90-year-old marathon runner syndrome," -- those chipper news features about exceptions to the rule. This is an overarching book, digesting many magazine articles and other secondary sources, supplemented by her own experience and her own voice, and interviews with people who are aging well. All in all, she places the "natural transitions" of aging in a nice progressive context. I can't wait for the next time a supermarket checker, however well meant, calls me "Young Lady," and I get the chance to tell him how proud I am of every wrinkle, and all that life has taught me. Next time I will not swallow.

Ashton Applewhite’s book is a masterwork into which the author has obviously poured her heart, soul, and considerable intelligence. This book is an eye-opener AND a call to action AND a must read for anyone who is growing older (hint: we all are!) There are so many myths, distortions, deceptions, and prejudices against the whole reality of aging that it is truly frightening. Bottom line is we will all be impacted by the choices that are being made and the policies instituted based on all this misinformation. Applewhite’s manifesto is not only painstakingly researched and impressively organized, it is also a “good read” by a good writer. Educate yourself. Educate your friends and family. This is an important conversation for all of us to be having now. The quality of our lives as well as our longevity may well depend on it.

First, the stars. I only give 5 stars to things I consider all-time literary masterpieces, so 4 stars is pretty much my top rating for anything in this genre. In other words, I thought this book was great. Reading This Chair Rocks (love the title), I was surprised at how much internalized ageism I uncovered. I hadn't ever really thought about ageism as a thing, except in terms of job discrimination, which is fairly obvious. By the time you are halfway into this book you will not doubt that it is a thing. A very big thing, that takes a toll on our health and happiness throughout our lives, whether we are experiencing ageist attitudes from others or imposing them upon ourselves. The book is well-written, funny, and thought-provoking, and I had quite a few aha! moments where Applewhite made an observation or analysis that resonated with me but that I'd never consciously considered before. I'm seeing the world in a new way since reading this book, and I plan to give copies to friends and family, because the more people who begin to think differently about the process of aging, the better for all of us. Highly recommended.

Ms. Applewhite is a cultural incendiary. With evidence, research, and logic, she debunks old beliefs about being old. A fascinating, compelling, catalytic book. Changes how you think about being old, how you interact with elders, and the assumptions you make about being old. Makes important suggestions for systemic changes desperately needed to meet the needs of our elder population and their families. Reading it made me feel even more vibrant and optimistic than I already do (and I have a podcast called, The Thing About Aging.) So much of how aging looks and feels is our lens. Thanks for polishing that up, Ms. A!

I enjoyed the beginning of the book but the last couple of chapters seemed a bit too long. I did appreciate the quotations provided by the author.

Ashton Applewhite’s incredibly important book, This Chair Rocks: A Manifesto Against Ageism, should be required reading for just about everyone. If you think that’s an exaggeration, think again. There are three things every person experiences: birth, life, and death. That’s it. There’s only one trajectory for everybody on the planet and there’s nothing we can do — or should want to — to alter it. As my sister said as my 95-year-old mother lay dying: “None of us is getting out of here alive.” No, we’re not. And since none of us knows what our life span will be, why shouldn’t we get to where we’re all going as comfortably, as self-sufficiently, and as joyfully as possible? We should, but it hasn’t been easy to do in a culture that devalues us as we age, because the last acceptable American “ism” is ageism. It’s Applewhite’s stated mission to radicalize us to rise up against it, fight it, and conquer it. Just as society undertook the fight in the 20th century against every other “ism”— racism, sexism, anti-Semitism, and homophobia — it’s time, in this 21st century, to battle ageism. And Applewhite gives us the factual tools to do so. Through scholarly, but entertaining, research, she debunks the myths about age that have held our society hostage by those who have a vested, corporate, financial interest in our devaluation: from beauty companies and the entertainment industries that dishonors our bodies and our looks, to a health care system financially exorbitant to navigate and financed by powerful pharmaceutical hucksters. Unlike far eastern cultures where the elderly are declared “national treasures,” Western culture denigrates what, in reality, both on and off the job, is our increased wisdom, experience, talent, and knowledge. Applewhite proves that we have the ability to enjoy and live as fulfilling lives in our later years as we did in our youth. This book will shock you into recognizing just how hideously propagandized we have been to feel otherwise. It’s time we put a stop to the false narratives and honored ourselves in every moment. Applewhite has started this battle. Read her book and join the fight for what is everyone’s right to live every year of life with dignity, happiness, comfort, and a rockin’ sense of self-worth. Every book you buy is an intellectual investment: there is no investment more worthwhile than the one you make in yourself.

I am grateful that so many took the time to share their observations and opinions. The earlier reviews have summarized the book well. They persuaded me to read this book. So, I will limit my contribution to just a few thoughts the author triggered for me. "What is the hardest prejudice to let go of? A prejudice against myself - my own future, older self - as inferior to my younger self. That's the linchpin of age denial." (p. 7) Our mindset is critical. How much time and energy are we investing in reliving our past relative to our investment in creating our future? "It turns out that it's very hard to estimate the value of work before we lose it." (p.166) Agree. It has been five years since I retired. I am a recovering workaholic. I still struggle for purpose, meaning and structure. However, I think that the millennials are better at finding balance in their lives. I also believe that their relationships with their spouses and children will be better for it. Hopefully, their transition to retirement might be much easier. The author shares a Mexican saying - The appearance of the bull changes when you enter the ring. The matador sees the bull very differently than the spectators. The life force is very strong. (p. 210) I have struggled with my End of Life Directive for some time. Now, I better understand why I struggle. In summary, a very worthy investment of your time. I strongly recommend this book.

In This Chair Rocks: A Manifesto against Ageism, Ashton Applewhite has created an informative and entertaining guide for living the second half of our lives with confidence and power. Citing research and credible sources, she dismantles the stereotypes about older age, giving us a practical assessment of the good and the bad. She identifies common ground where all ages can value each other. Each chapter ends with a segment called Push Back! consisting of action strategies for changing our own perspectives and behavior, and that of the culture. This Chair Rocks creates a new term: Applewhite refers to us as “olders” since most other terms are negatively perceived. The book is like a guide for navigating the second half of life. It covers everything from how the media demeans us, to older sexuality, to the economic contributions of of olders, to the way mothers, the disabled, and olders have similar needs. Recently I fumed about an ageist stereotype being perpetrated by a national news service. Most friends were supportive, but some said I should lighten up. If I had only had This Chair Rocks to refer to, because right on page 237, Applewhite documents that this accusation of “no sense of humor” is a typical way we deflect the unpleasant evidence of ageism. Another example: in that same news story, a national anchor bleated about millennials not being able to find jobs because Baby Boomers refused to retire. On page 157, Applewhite thoroughly debunks that economic fallacy as well. She doesn’t glorify age, because no age is perfect. Yet one comes away from This Chair Rocks feeling more capable of savoring the good. Ashton Applewhite has done us a huge service in writing this book. I bought it in paperback so I could refer to it, dogeared and highlighted, for years to come.